I'm losing some of the most important friendships I've ever made. I feel they've lost the ability to care much about crazy old me, and I've lost the ability to stand up to them and tell them how I feel. I've lost so much hair this past week, month, year, decade. I'm losing my friends as they go on missions, traveling the world and serving the Lord, while I stay behind, crocheting scarves and wondering what I even believe in.
I've lost cable and I'm losing Netflix.
Dang, I feel empty. I'm not even sure how this all happened. It was like I woke up from a dream where everything was right, where my friends were my heroes and there was bright music and tv show references galore and I was happy and safe. That is a realistic description, both literally and figuratively. I dreamt that this morning and woke up to find I was alone, in pain, and no one would be there to save me with a doughnut, a smile, a muted trumpet, and an homage to Scrubs.
Something is wrong with me on so many levels.
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