Streetlights

I found out at one in the morning that I boy I was friends with in middle school killed himself. I cried and listened to his guitar videos on youtube, then went to sleep until ten. Stayed home from school because being around people would make me cry and did chores for hours and listened to his original composition some more. Cried. Stopped crying. Texted Micaiah about it and was glad he had already heard about it. He's friends with the boy's sister. Thought about her. Cried some more.

Band festival came and went. I want to give Sam and Dayel and Miller and everyone ice cream. Wind Symphony made me smile.

I called Preethi, and she is beautiful. She let me talk and then cry and then told me about Schaack's kind-heartedness. She made me laugh and I her. She told me we needed to find the new normal, a world where his memory could live on as our lives moved on. She's so dear to me. I hope she's right about next April. I'm going to listen to his dear song again, but with a sad smile.